


You Told Me Now

by katling



Series: Worthy of such faith [6]
Category: Far Cry (Video Games), Far Cry 4
Genre: Emotional Manipulation, Frottage, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, M/M, Past Drug Use, Sexual Content, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-30
Updated: 2015-04-30
Packaged: 2018-03-26 10:40:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3847864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katling/pseuds/katling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This was a little more difficult to write than I anticipated. I needed to get Ajay to the point where he actually would go and confront Amita. He’d do it willingly. I’m not entirely certain if I’ll write a post Amita confrontation or whether I’ll wrap that up into the post-Pagan confrontation.  I’ll see how I go and what comes to mind. I think the Amita confrontation needs a piece to show what he does and to give a bit more story to the aftermath of that. Anyway, this one is set after the whole thing with the Temple of Jalendu and the defence of Utkarsh.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Told Me Now

Ajay walked away from Utkarsh and did not look back. He kept walking and eventually climbing until he found a ledge tucked away half way up a cliff. Only then did he stop. He shucked off his weapons and bags and sat down with his back to the cliff and his arms wrapped around his legs. He slowly lowered his forehead to his knees and simply sat there and breathed.

Up until now, he’d never doubted that agreeing with Sabal was the right decision but for the first time, doubts were starting to grow and fester. He couldn’t get the misery on Bhadra’s face out of his mind and guilt welled within him. She was clearly unhappy with his decision but… his mother had been a Tarun Matara. It _wasn’t_ a bad thing. Maybe Amita had made her think it was?

But if Pagan Min hadn’t come to Kyrat and started a civil war, well, all the indications were that his parents would have been deliriously happy together. And it was also obvious that his Mom had received a good education. His father had described her as intelligent and charming. So it wasn’t as though Bhadra wasn’t going to be able to have a future or would be denied education or even the ability to marry if she wanted. If anyone tried to say otherwise, well, Ishwari Ghale was the precedent Bhadra could use and Ajay would back her up.

He raised his head and rested his chin on one knee. He looked out over the vista that his current position provided him though he wasn’t really seeing it. 

It wasn’t Bhadra that was bothering him really. It was Sabal. The way he’d referred to Amita had been… worrying. Admittedly he didn’t really know what had been going on between the two of them while he was out and about and he didn’t actually have any reason to think Sabal was lying beyond some bizarre drug-induced hallucinations that may not even be accurate. And Amita… well, he’d been on the receiving end of a couple of verbal lashings from her for supporting Sabal so the idea that she’d been… trying to undermine Sabal wasn’t exactly out of left field.

But it was the fervency that was really making him unnerved and unsettled. The fervency Sabal had shown at the Temple of Jalendu. The fervency he’d seen taken to extremes in those hallucinations. Which were induced by Yuma Lau and thus dubious at best. He hoped.

He sighed and fished out his radio. He clicked the button twice, then four times, then three times and then he switched over to their private channel and waited.

“ _Ajay?_ ”

“Yeah, it’s me.”

“ _Is everything alright?_ ”

Ajay was silent for a moment. “I… yeah. Yeah… sorry… I didn’t…”

“ _Ajay_ ,” Sabal said, breaking through Ajay’s fumbled words. He sounded sober when he continued. “ _I think I know what this is about._ ” He sighed and went silent for a moment. “ _I’m going to be caught up with these artillery bases for the rest of the day. Will you meet me at Bhirabata Outpost?_ ”

Ajay pulled out his map and found the outpost in question. “Yeah. I probably won’t get there until after dark though.”

“ _That’s okay._ ” There was a moment of silence and when Sabal spoke again, he sounded more intent and quiet. “ _Please come, Ajay. I do not wish…_ ” Ajay heard a sigh before Sabal continued. “ _Please come._ ”

Ajay swallowed hard. “I will. I’d better get going if I’m going to make it.”

“ _Right. Good. I will see you tonight._ ”

The radio clicked off and Ajay stared at it for a moment before he shoved the radio back in his pack and got up. He pulled on his bags and picked up his weapons and started down the cliff.

*********

It was well and truly after dark by the time he reached Bhirabata and he nodded to the guards as he walked through the gates.

“Sabal’s waiting for you inside,” one of them said, nodding towards the safe house.

“Thanks,” Ajay replied before shouldering the door open. He let it shut behind him and leaned against it with a sigh.

“You look tired,” Sabal said, getting to his feet and walking over. The older man quickly and efficiently divested Ajay of his burdens and his jacket and gloves then guided him over to sit down near the stove.

“Long day,” Ajay replied, closing his eyes and letting the warmth of the stove sink in.

“Indeed. Have you eaten?” 

Sabal looked down at the younger man with a troubled expression. Their middle of the night conversation had come back to him several times since Ajay had contacted him and he could take a fair guess as to what Ajay was concerned about. He’d thought… _hoped_ … Ajay was too dedicated to him to question such things but it seemed it was not so. He had to make sure Ajay did not turn from him now. Not now that they were so close to victory!

Ajay nodded. “Yeah, a couple of hours ago.” He wasn’t sure he wanted to broach the subject that had brought him here but avoiding it probably wasn’t an option either. “Bhadra… she looked…”

Sabal sighed and dropped to the floor next to Ajay. This at least was something he felt he could deal with. “I don’t know what Amita has filled her head with about being Tarun Matara but given her opinions on our traditions, I am sure it has not been good.”

“My Mom… in his journals, my father described her as being charming and intelligent.”

Sabal nodded. “That is what I have heard of her. She was, according to what I have been told, a remarkable woman. A true leader.”

“So she was educated?” Ajay asked, turning his head just enough to see Sabal out of the corner of his eye.

“Of course!” Sabal said with a frown. “There is no tradition against any child being educated.” He sighed. “The war has… ruined the education system. You either send your children to schools run by Pagan’s people and have them brainwashed or attempt to teach them at home. _That_ is one thing I wish to change. I wish to start the schools up again with proper teachers, even if we have to get them from overseas at first. And Bhadra will get the best teachers we can find. It is not right to have an uneducated Tarun Matara.”

Ajay relaxed a little at that. The restoration of the education system was one of the things Mohan had talked about. He wanted to make it government run and free for all Kyrati citizens.

“Good… that’s good,” he said with relief.

Sabal reached over and turned his head gently. “Ajay, I know I got a little… intense back at the temple and I apologise. I was angry at Amita and… worried about you and… well…” He smiled ruefully. “There was a bit of adrenaline in there as well. I spoke poorly.” He caressed the younger man’s cheek with his thumb. “I know you worry about those visions you saw but…” He ducked his head a little and let a troubled expression grow on his face. “Do you not trust me? Those visions were born from drugs Yuma gave you. You must know that they are likely skewed the way she wished them to be. I had hoped…”

He let his voice trail off and his expression turn to one of unhappiness. It was manipulative, yes, he would admit that, but the Golden Path could not afford to have any further conflict in its leadership. Not now. He needed to erase Ajay’s doubts, especially given what he knew he would need to ask his lover to do in the days ahead. He _needed_ Ajay by his side, both for the good of the Golden Path and Kyrat and for far more personal reasons.

Ajay drew in a sharp breath at Sabal’s reaction then slumped against the other man. “Of course I trust you, Sabal. I… shit.” 

He sighed and closed his eyes and Sabal wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

“This was never going to be easy,” Sabal said quietly. “There are many difficult things we must do. Terrible decisions we must make. But all for the future of Kyrat. To make it better. When this is done and Pagan Min is gone, you will not have to do such things ever again, I promise you.”

Ajay sighed and leaned further into Sabal’s embrace. “I… it’s just… has Amita really been that bad?”

Sabal snorted. “She has _always_ been that bad.” He shook his head. “She has gotten worse. You have thrown your support behind me and nearly all in the Golden Path have followed. Her support base has been eroded to next to nothing. Unsurprisingly, she likes that as little as I would have in her position.”

“I… didn’t know.”

“She would hardly have let you know before now,” Sabal said dryly. “She still wished to gain your support. But now… now she will likely turn on you as well. What was done today… it was fairly definitive.”

“She’s yelled at me before,” Ajay said with a small amount of rueful humour.

“About destroying drugs and not letting her turn Kyrat into a drug supplier.” Sabal’s lip curled in contempt. “She thinks that would bring prosperity to us. Ha! Maybe in the short term but in the long term we would be viewed as a problem by the outside world and you would know better than I do what that would bring.”

Ajay winced. “Yeah, nothing good.” He frowned a little. “You said that the visions… well, that they were what Yuma would want. What did you mean?”

Sabal was silent for a moment. He’d been thinking this through all day and felt that he had finally found a way to silence the doubts brought on by the visions Ajay had seen. He had been hoping that Ajay had picked up on his first subtle suggestion.

“A… division between you and I, this is what Yuma would want, isn’t it?” Sabal smiled thinly. “I doubt she knows how things truly lie between us but she at least knows you support me and that your support has been constant. While Amita and I were at odds, the Golden Path…” He sighed and ran a hand down his face. “We did not achieve much. But then you came and you backed _me_. The Golden Path began to make great strides, thanks to you. We became united, moving in one direction. We have become a true threat to Pagan Min. Yuma would want to drive a wedge between us to try and destroy the Golden Path and what better way than to have you doubt me at every turn.”

Ajay mulled that over. It made sense, especially given how angry Yuma had been at him in lieu of his mother. She’d want to destroy everything he had, wouldn’t she? And so would Pagan Min. He was the one always talking and making snide comments. Between the two of them, that did put a new slant on the visions. It made them seem less like premonitions and more like manipulations. Something designed to make him see Sabal’s actions in a dim light, to make them seem more sinister than they actually were and to drive them apart.

“You’re right,” he said with a shake of his head. “Now I feel like an idiot. I’m sorry, Sabal.”

Sabal chuckled and pulled Ajay around so that the younger man was straddling his lap. “There is no need to apologise, Ajay. This is all new to you, this level of manipulation.”

Ajay leaned forward and rested his forehead against Sabal’s. He felt himself relax for the first time since he’d dealt with Yuma. He had a rational explanation for the visions and he could put them aside now.

“Some of it is,” he agreed. “But not the drugs. I should have known better than to believe any shit I saw while on drugs.”

Sabal frowned. “You have taken drugs?”

Ajay snorted. “Yeah.” He grimaced. “I… wasn’t a good person back home, Sabal. I got involved in a lot of shit. I didn’t back you on the drugs because I’m a prude or whatever Amita thinks. I backed you because I’ve seen the kind of damage they can do.”

Sabal’s frowned deepened and he cradled Ajay’s face in his hands. “You were hurt?”

“No,” Ajay said hastily. “No, I had a couple of bad trips but I got out of it before I could really screw myself up. But I knew people who ODed and others who… well, fell off the rails pretty badly because they got addicted.”

“I didn’t know.”

Ajay smiled ruefully. “I didn’t tell you. Who really wants to talk about how stupid they’ve been?”

“That is true,” Sabal said with a chuckle.

“Besides, I’d straightened myself out,” Ajay continued. “Got myself out of all of that. Then I found out Mom was sick and then she died and I… just had to do as she’d asked before she died. Bring her back to Lakshmana.” He sighed. “Which I haven’t done yet.”

Sabal pulled him into a brief but fervent kiss. “We will find Lakshmana. I promise you that. You will fulfil your mother’s wishes.” He gave Ajay a curious look. “She had truly never told you anything of Kyrat?”

Ajay shook his head. “Not a thing. I think part of it was everything about her and my father and Pagan Min but I think… she also knew that I’d want to come here and if I did, I wouldn’t be able to turn my back on what was going on.”

“She was protecting you.”

Ajay nodded. “Yeah, I think so. Maybe she intended to tell me when I turned eighteen or something but because I was such a mess back then, she didn’t.” He laughed ruefully. “I would have come charging over here and probably made things worse than they already were.”

Sabal smiled and pulled him closer. “You would have backed Amita?” he teased.

Ajay laughed. “Sabal, I said I was a mess. I probably would have backed Pagan Min!”

Sabal bore them down to the floor and pressed their bodies together, drawing a gasp and a moan from Ajay.

“I would not have liked being your enemy,” he said, his tone turning suddenly intense.

Ajay smiled and slid a hand into Sabal’s hair, pulling it out of the messy ponytail he usually wore. “It could have been pretty hot,” he teased. “Enemies who are drawn to each other, becoming secret lovers, that agonising moment when I would have had to choose between Pagan Min and you, probably after you’d been captured, then a daring escape…”

He was cut off by a searing kiss and Sabal’s hands sliding under his shirt, hot and searching across his skin. He made a small sound of pleasure and arched into the touch. 

“Think how awesome it would have been,” he gasped as Sabal broke the kiss to yank both their shirts off. “It would have started out with angry kisses, maybe hate sex… oh, fuck…”

He gasped and clutched at Sabal’s shoulders as the older man first laved his nipples then gently bit down and worried at them, sending sharp spikes of pleasure and pain stabbing through him. Then Sabal pulled away and Ajay saw that his lover’s face was dark and hectic with lust and desire.

“Continue,” Sabal said hoarsely.

Ajay’s eyes widened then his let his head fall back onto the floor. A grin chased across his face. So Sabal liked his ‘what if’ scenario. 

“Then… then… it would have changed,” he continued. Sabal watched him for a moment then lowered his mouth to his stomach. “I would have gotten hurt. Climbing… climbing a bell tower to…” He gasped and writhed as Sabal mouthed his way across and down his stomach, sucking small bruises into Ajay’s skin in places. “…to fix the damage you’d done. I’d have fallen. Not badly but you… you were still in the vicinity and came back.”

He paused to help Sabal pull off his shoes and jeans and underwear, leaving him naked on the floor. Sabal sat back on his heels and simply looked at him for a moment before lowering himself down again.

“Keep going.”

“You… you come back to the tower and I’m there, helpless.” He moaned as Sabal’s mouth traced a line down his hip. “Not bad… badly hurt, just a bit stunned. I’ve fallen just one level. You’re… you’re worried. That I’ve done something worse and you… you fuss over me. Oh _fuck_! Sabal, please… more…”

Sabal paused and sucked a bruise into Ajay’s hip then he gave a dark, pleased smile as he looked up at Ajay.

“Keep. Going.”

Ajay groaned and licked his lips. “You check to make sure I haven’t hurt myself seriously then… then you kiss me. But not like we have before, hard and rough. This one is soft and gentle and worried.”

The press of lips against his made him stop as Sabal did just what he had described – kissed him softly and gently. He then pulled away just a little.

“What then?”

Ajay whimpered and writhed a little. Sabal’s ministrations had him as hard as a rock and just short of begging Sabal to fuck him into the floor _right now_ but the gentle, sweet kiss had disarmed him, leaving him flailing a little. 

“You… we… kiss for a bit,” he said, tilting his head as Sabal began pressing soft kisses down his throat. “You scold me for not being careful, for taking too many chances.”

Sabal chuckled against his skin. “I have already done that.”

“Uhuh,” Ajay replied. He shivered at the sensation of Sabal’s now soft kisses that followed the route he’d taken earlier. “I… I’m cocky in return. Laughing at your concern. Because I could be a jerk back then. You…” 

He moaned as Sabal’s hand wrapped around his cock but the older man did not make any further move.

“What do I do?” Sabal’s voice was low and right in his ear. 

Ajay closed his eyes and arched towards his lover but Sabal would not give him the friction he wanted and he was forced to focus again.

“You… you yell at me. You tell me you couldn’t bear it if I was hurt. That you…” He paused then decided to go for broke. They hadn’t really talked about their feelings and this would either make or break things right now. “You love me.”

He felt Sabal go utterly still next to him and his heart sank. He didn’t dare open his eyes and see the expression on the man’s face. He didn’t _want_ to see it. Then his mouth was captured in a truly _searing_ kiss. A kiss that _claimed_ him, _possessed_ him. Sabal’s hands clutched at him and the weight of his body suddenly rested fully on top of him, as though the older man was trying to keep him there forever.

“ _Ajay_.” Sabal sounded utterly _wrecked_ , his voice hoarse and desperate. “Open your eyes.”

He did so and the expression on Sabal’s face made his breath catch and his heart clench in his chest.

“I _do_ ,” Sabal said. It was a plea, a demand, a promise all rolled into one. “I love you, Ajay. I should have told you before. I did not know…”

Ajay pulled him down into another fervent kiss. The story had started out as a joke but then he hadn’t realised how much he’d wanted… _needed_ … to hear those words from Sabal until he’d suddenly found himself at that point in the story. He hadn’t realised how much he’d needed to _know_ where he stood with the older man. It wiped away any last doubts in his mind.

“I love you too,” he gasped when they finally broke apart. “So fucking much.”

They were pressed so closely together that he felt as much as heard Sabal’s groan. The older man pulled away only long enough to strip off the rest of his clothes then he was back, pressing him down against the floor, moving between his legs until their cocks were lined up. They rutted against each other, their mouths meeting in desperate, open-mouthed kisses that captured their gasps and moans and curses. Finally Sabal cried out and he spilled hot and wet between them. Ajay grabbed his arse and shoved his hips up against his lover until he followed, his own cry swallowed by Sabal’s kiss.

Sabal rolled onto his side and pulled Ajay close against him, uncaring about the slick mess on their stomachs. Ajay wrapped his arms around his lover and tucked his head under Sabal’s chin.

“I should have told you before,” Sabal murmured in apology, running a hand through Ajay’s hair. “You shouldn’t have had to drag it out of me.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Ajay replied, feeling sated and happy. “You told me now.”


End file.
